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Blog Swap: Angel Dust & Fairy Kisses

Hey my wonderful lovers…I know that you have been waiting for I LOVE…Fridays but this week, we’re taking a break…and I’m not even here!! If you want my post, you can find it over at the home of the Sassy Ginger…And now, I leave the floor to my gorgeous swap-partner.

Hey kids! Sassy Little Ginger here. PQ and I decided to participate in the 20SB blog swap, but we also decided to forget about it, procrastinate, and scramble to throw some shit together at the last minute, so here’s what I came up with.

I was actually going to write about the art of procrastination because we’re both pros, but I’ll save that for later. Instead, I’m going to write about an epidemic that’s going on in my life that, quite frankly, pisses me the hell off. I’m cranky, deal with it.

Ever since I’ve had an email account, I’ve received mass forwards from my friends and family. Sometimes they’re funny and perverted, which is cool, but if they’re talking about how they cherish our friendship (the friendship that dwindled because the only time we talk is on AIM or Gchat) or actually believe they’re going to die in 4 days due to flea infestation if they don’t forward the angel of love on, then I get angry and have to increase my spam list.

Over the past 6 months, I’ve been getting text forwards sent to my cell phone. At first I thought it was cute, ok whatever, cool, but now I get about 2 a day. And of course they’re not good ones. Yesterday I received this twice: Once from my cousin, and then from her mom. Because apparently she doesn’t assume it’s already been sent to me:

“You’ve been given the hot mommy award! Pass this on to all the hot mamas in your phonebook and you’ll be blessed with a happy life and beautiful children!”

Cute, except I’m not a fucking mom, won’t be for a long ass time, and they have never received something like this from me, so why do they constantly have to send them?

I’ve received some of the most ridiculous friendship text forwards, many of which are accompanied with a song and an animated picture of a heart, flowers, or even sponge bob. The worst part is that all of my friends and family are pretty close with one another, so once I receive it from one friend, I know I’m fucked. I get it from my cousin, who forwards it to everyone she knows, and then I get it from her mom, who does the same. Then it gets around to my aunt, who sends it to me, and I receive it from her daughter. I then get it from her sister in law, and then two of my friends who they have become close with. Basically, once I receive a forward it pisses me the hell off because I know I’ll be receiving it 6 more times.

Last night I fell asleep at 8pm and received a friendship “you will be blessed with health, wealth and happiness if you send this to 12 people” forward around 8:30. I was pissed because I was sleeping. Of course, I received it 3 more times, which pleasantly surprised me because that’s significantly low.

I was still mad that I got it while sleeping, so I made one up and sent it myself to everyone who has bothered me with this shit. It went like this:

“I am sending you angel dust and fairy kisses. You will be faced with one hell of a blessing very soon. Keep in mind what you really want or need, whether it be money, love, happiness or just obedient children that you will stop regretting you ever had. The dust and the kisses have faith in you, and will give you exactly what you deserve. I have faith in you too. Don’t ask questions, this isn’t some sort of stupid forward. Just send it to 30 people by the time you’re ready for this to happen. I’m serious, guys. Send this on. I did. You’re not too good for this one, and this isn’t the lame type of forward you’re used to. You won’t regret this.”

I received it back 5 times. Suckers!!!

{ 10 comments… add one }
  • Cassie April 24, 2009, 2:45 pm


    I’m going to try that out the next time I get one of those!!! LOL

  • Just A Girl April 24, 2009, 2:49 pm

    Oh my god I fucking hate those text forwards so much. I told all of my friends that the next person to send me one was getting punched in the mouth. My old roommate sent me one that was all “There’s a kid with cancer and all the phone companies are gonna donate 6 cents for each time this is forwarded.” I ripped her a new one because 1) phone companies do not give a FUCK about 1 kid with cancer, 2) there are thousands of kids with cancer and 3) there is absolutely no fucking way to track it anyway, so if they DID care, the phone companies would just cut a check and be done.

    She texted me back and said “But it’s a kiddo so just in case.”

    Sometimes I want to shoot myself in the face.

    Just A Girl’s last blog post..TMI Thursday: My brain is mush and so is this blog

  • PrincessQ April 24, 2009, 2:50 pm

    I’m usually really careful with who I send each ‘fwd’ text to…and I have to be conscious of my friends on the west coast…I’ve sent it at 4 am a couple of times without realizing but now I’m more careful…LOL

  • SLG April 24, 2009, 2:57 pm

    Hey, if it’s a drunk text at 4am that’s one thing… but if I’m getting a text in the middle of the night with a fucking friendship poem, I’m gonna be pissed! and yes, that’s happened to me… apparently friendship poems are URGENT MAIL!

    SLG’s last blog post..Blog Swap: Boobs at Work

  • LiLu April 24, 2009, 3:00 pm

    Chain TEXTS?!? That would seriously piss me the eff off… the emails are bad enough, but at least they don’t take up space.

    LiLu’s last blog post..The Shiz My Boyfriend Says, Volume VII

  • topsurf April 24, 2009, 11:47 pm

    ROFL! That is great, I am going to have to use that the next time I get a spam text!

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