I should’ve known early on that my life was going to be filled with unstable boys. I mean, the signs were all there as early as 9 years old. Actually, they were there earlier but I was too much of a tomboy to pick up on them. The most distinctive summer of my life was the summer of 95. It was my last summer before coming to the US and of course, I had to meet the boy of my dreams. I was ten years old and he was 13. Our first meeting should’ve hinted at the events that would follow in the next 2 weeks but hey…I was 10, alright? We were on a family vacation. Big, beautiful place near the beach, with a huge pool, entertainment center and 3 meals a day, all practically free! So we got there and while my family was unpacking, I went to the park. It was a fenced in community so my parents had no problem letting me wander around on my own. So I got on that big swing that I love so much and just kinda chilled. I was probably wishing that I had a book. I can’t remember that far back.
So, out of the corner of my eye, I see this boy coming up to me. Now, remember…I was 10 and a big tomboy so I was like “Oh, another kid” instead of “Oh my gosh, it’s a boy. AH!” So he sits down, we start to talk and we’ll call him Steve. Turns out Steve’s family’s been there for a couple of days and he was glad to have someone else around besides his big sister, blah blah. All good right? Basically, what happened is that I instantly became his girlfriend. Gotta love how that shit works. All his friends took me in and I spent the 2 weeks chillin, playin cards and just plain old goofin off with them.
It was all peachy, except when Steve threw jealousy tantrums. Oh yes. You heard right. Like one day, he and I had a fight about something stupid. I THINK it had to do with the fact that I hang out with the boys all day. Um. Hello? I was a tomboy? Yeah. So I went to the park and hopped on the swing and it was like 5 of us on there. Yes, the other 4 happened to be all the guys. What? I WAS 10. Right? So, we’re sitting, laughing, blah blah, making fun of each other (Isn’t that what kids do?) when we see Steve coming across the yard. He sees me with the other guys and I swear to you, he stopped…kicking a water bottle that was on the ground and huffed off in the direction he came from. One of the guys, I think it was his best friend, ran after him. I just sat there, shocked and pissed off. Who the fuck did he think he is?
OK, so I was a little bad-ass when I was young. That night, after dinner, we all gathered around at the park again…he showed his face and I…told him off. I mean, bitched him OUT. I was yelling at him, all of our friends next to me and I was going off at him about how dare he try to put a claim on me and OMG, couldn’t he please grow up? I shit you not. So he put his head down and apologized. The rest of our time was fun and peachy. The morning that we were leaving, he walked me and my family out. We had already exchanged contact information and right before I got in the car, he gave me a hug and kiss on the cheek. *sigh*
I never did follow through with him because we moved to the US but sometimes I still think about him. I wonder what he’s doing with his life now. It’s been 14 years and I don’t think I’ll ever forget about him.
So, while writing all this, I realize
1) What a bad-ass bitch I was even at 10.
2) Men in my life have been on the jealous side forever so I might be doomed.
3) It was obvious early on that I would spend my life bitching out men who did stupid shit.
Now, I told you that story to tell you this story. I was driving in this morning and on the radio, there were kids anywhere from 13-17 calling in and telling their stories about friends with benefits. Yeah, you heard right. Middle and high school kids talking about friends with benefits. I might’ve had the drama in my life early but I didn’t have my first kiss until I was 14…and with the exception of the few distinct hoochies, no girls in my school kissed unless they were in a relationship with a guy.
I didn’t have my first friends with benefits until I was 17 and by benefits, I mean, stealing a quick kiss in the stairwell between class or staying after school to hang out. I mean, I’m sure if I wanted, he would’ve wanted to be my boyfriend but I wasn’t really into him like that. He was just a good kisser. (I know, hoochie right?).
When I hear these kids speak about friends with benefits at 13, 14, 15…It scares me. I know that I have a lot of friends who are parents so I wanted to let you guys know that the phenomenon is more widespread than you might be able to guess…so I suggest (though I’m sure you already know), you have a close relationship with your kids and always be aware of the people in their lives, their sexual activity, etc.
I mean, really…I’m a hoochie now but I just liked kissing boys back then. I didn’t even let a boy touch my boobies till I was 18.
Also please welcome Bethany…she finally posted her first blog!! www.thepqnation.com/smartsassyliberal