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On Being Selfish – and Other Things

So I’ve been a little selfish with my time lately.

I no longer return phone calls right away unless they’re followed by a text that says “Please call me right away.”

I no longer stay logged into chat even when I don’t have time to chat.

I no longer over-extend my time beyond what is allotted, and reserve some much needed ‘Me’ time.

And it feels good.

As silly as it may sound, I never imagined I would be living a life where my own needs and priorities were important enough to come first.

I do feel a tad guilty because I feel disconnected from my closest friends.  I haven’t talked to my best friend of 10 years in weeks. I even missed his moving day because I was feeling sick. (How dare I!) The old me would’ve been a trooper and made my way out to help him move and then continued to die when I got home.

Why the change?

I came to the realization that the frazzled, overwhelmed, emotional mess of a person I was becoming was not good for ANYONE. I can’t be a good friend if I’m not feeling fulfilled. I can’t be a good friend if my own life is a HOT MESS.

The truth is, I’m working hard to get to a point where I have a balance.  It doesn’t take away from the fact that I *do* think about my friends daily. I might seem distant and not paying attention but I am.

I just can’t pause every day to say hello.

Is that awful? I do feel guilty and I’m not even Catholic.

But I’ve learned that my friends understand. Most of them have been here for years. You know, the place where having a life is a good thing and taking time for one’s self is good for everyone in the long run.

My priorities at the moment?

My education, my health, my writing/career and my relationship.

You’ll find me studying, writing, exercising and networking online. Sometimes around the city.

Other times? You’ll find me on my couch, enjoying much needed downtime with my boyfriend. Or hanging out with my good friends.

But you will always find me.

I’m selfish with my time, but not selfish with my love.


News:

This weekend, I’m walking in the Help the Homeless Walkathon. Wanna walk with me?

I put up new pictures on my Etsy! Go check them out, favorite my shop and, ya know, maybe buy one? 🙂

If we aren’t connected on LinkedIn, we should be.

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Miss Scorpio November 19, 2010, 10:14 am

    It’s okay. Trust me. You’re true friends will be there.

    • PrincessQ November 19, 2010, 5:15 pm

      xo

  • Gyspy Soul November 19, 2010, 12:38 pm

    I know how you feel. I’m trying to do the same, but the guilt of feeling like a selfish, cold-hearted bitch keeps slowing me down. I hate to feel that way, but sometimes it’s a must because doing what’s right for you should be a priority. LOVE YOU!!!

    • PrincessQ November 19, 2010, 5:15 pm

      Exactly! Love you too!

  • Liebchen November 19, 2010, 12:54 pm

    I’ve felt super guilty lately when I’ve had to say no to so many happy hours and weekend plans because of first the marathon, then school, then the move, etc. I’m afraid that people get frustrated and think I’m not trying, but really, I am.

    • PrincessQ November 19, 2010, 5:16 pm

      Sometimes you just have to do what you gotta do and let the chips fall.

  • Suburban Sweetheart November 19, 2010, 3:37 pm

    This is a good way to learn to be, as long as you don’t let it trample your compassion. It sounds like you’re on the right course.

    • PrincessQ November 19, 2010, 5:16 pm

      I’m definitely trying. I have too much compassion, no matter how jaded I get sometimes.

  • Rachel November 30, 2010, 7:59 am

    I’ve taken the same attitude of late; and it really does work wonders doesn’t it. Just taking a few hours for myself at the weekend has improved my emotional state. I naturally find myself wanting to help and guide people if they come to me for something; and like you, in the past, despite being ill I would of jumped straight up. Now however, I’m taking a bit more time for myself.

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