Don’t get me wrong. I love a good fart joke as much as the next guy…but I was surprised at my ability to accept the fact that my boyfriend is a serial farter. True love and all that I guess.
It started on our third date. He was on the floor tying his shoes and my roommate’s cat started walking up to him. Next thing I know, he’s lifted his leg and I couldn’t believe my ears…
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”
“I just wanted to scare the cat.”
“Did you just FART ON THE CAT?”
“Yes. It’s funny.”
“This is our third date! Really?”
“Oh come on…”
“No. Get up. Just…get up.”
It’s worse when he does it in my room…For those that have seen my room know…it is TINY…and I can’t open the door so the cats don’t come in. So when we’re lying in bed and he farts, it is lethal. One time, he was sitting on the bed when I was getting dressed…
“Oh…my…god, did you fart?!”
“What, you couldn’t walk 2 STEPS TO GET OUT IN TO THE HALL?”
My bed is small enough that he can’t be slick enough to dutch oven me but the one day when he farted when we were lying in bed THREE TIMES, I was ready to die. And then he offered to turn on my space heater to help it go away faster and I just looked at him in disbelief. Did he really think I’d let him dutch oven my ENTIRE ROOM?
So of course, it should be no surprise that this was how the conversation went when I met his mom for the first time…at some point, I uttered the words…
“Your son is a serial farter.”
“Oh I know…wait till you have to smell it.”
I love the hell out of my boyfriend but I still can’t believe I’m OK with this. Of course, he is learning. He makes the effort to go to the bathroom or outside if he has to fart now…
If only I could train him to sleep walk so he can leave the room when he’s farting in the middle of the night…
Alright…what stinky/weird traits have you overlooked because love was just worth it?
What was a deal breaker?
As always…it’s TMIT so go ahead and check out the other awesomely gross stories over at LiLu’s blog.