I’ve been blogging for at least 4 years…way before I started blogging on Myspace, I had LJ…and I’ve been writing for as long as I can remember…so it shouldn’t be a big deal that this is my 100th post because I’ve never kept count of my blogs…There used to be days when I posted 3 blogs throughout the day…no, seriously.
But see…the thing is, the 100th blog on my own site is kind of important. It’s a milestone. It’s proof that the site has been in business, that writing is not just about ranking and more importantly…I’ve realized how far I’ve come with writing…and how the meaning of writing has evolved in my life. So bear with me while I share this insight with you.
About three years ago, I wrote a post that was the explanation of why I write. What writing meant to me, why it was so important and why I wrote the way I do, so openly. The most important factor in the importance of writing to me was that it was a way for me to validate my life, thoughts, actions and words. Not just my words but the words of the people around me and validating the authenticity of experiences I have, whether they are good or bad. From good to worse, I kept documents of everything. Anytime something significant happened, I wrote it down right away so I wouldn’t forget the words…so the memory would be real. The reason for this was simply because I didn’t trust my own thoughts. I’ve been brought up to doubt everything about myself to the point where reality blurred with the parallel universe of the woman in my life who kept spewing her poison at me, day in and day out. My own thoughts became blurred and my own sanity came under scrutiny. So I had to keep writing…I kept emails, IM convos, voicemails…everything and went back to relive those moments to make sure they happened. I shared everything with my best friend so she could confirm my thoughts or explain why I might be misreading things. She knew the way my heart and brain worked so she pulled me out whenever I was drowning in the poison…
So I wrote.
Three years later, I realize that while the way I openly share my feelings, thoughts and opinions has remained the same, the way I doubt my own thoughts has definitely changed. I don’t second guess myself as much and I’ve learned to trust my own gut based on my experiences and the evolution I’ve undergone as a person after each painful or happy experience. So now I write to share my story…instead of validation, I seek impact…I seek recognition of a common feeling and experience in my audience. I share my story so that others who may feel alone the same way I did…I hope that this will help those of you who are new to my blog understand the passion and openness behind my words.
The biggest reward I can have as a writer is to know that somewhere…at some point…some of my words reached out to a heart, a soul, a fear, a broken wing to repair, to validate, to console, to cheer up, to relate. Starting this site was the biggest step I could take to reach out…because one of my biggest goals is to create a community where anyone can come and belong, regardless of life experience, past mistakes, current situations and any fears one might have. Everyone belongs here. Everyone who lives has a story to tell…and we’re here to share those stories. You may notice that lately, I’ve been writing more personal posts. That will be more often…in addition to every other blog I write, this is me bearing my soul to the world.
Does it make me vulnerable? Sure…but everyone needs to be able to relate, to feel like they belong…so here I am. Here is PQ Nation. As the founder of the site, I want to assure you that this isn’t where it ends. My vision for the site and the community it will create is much bigger…but as much as I want to get it ALL done at once, I know that’s not the right way to go…but I will tell you this much…PQ Nation will grow…We will have a community for single moms, for moms with children with special needs, for stay at home moms, for relationship advice, for writers, for freelancers, for recovering addicts, for students, for causes, for awareness, for….for…[fill in the blank]. This isn’t a far fetched dream. This is a reality that we will make happen step by step.
Rome wasn’t built in a day. PQ Nation isn’t built in 100 but we sure have had a hell of a start. The language of PQ Nation isn’t love but passion…because it is passion that sparks creativity. This nation will be governed with respect, applying the golden rule to every discussion, without discrimination. The borders don’t exist because creativity and passion know no inhibition.
So thank you to those of you who have been here from the beginning, those who have just joined us and those of you who might just be passing by…
Let’s celebrate the 100th post on the PQ Nation and raise our pens to at least one hundred more. Thank you to Wicked, Jaime, Rosie & Linda who always believed in me and helped me begin the site with unconditional support…to Phoenix,Squish and mC for being amazing additions…To all of our friends who supported my dream and our words to the site…And everyone else who is here with us, even if it’s once in a blue moon.
What does writing mean to you? If you have your own site, have you reached a milestone that’s important to you? What kind of blogger are you? What makes you stick around and/or come back to a blog post after post? Is there a specific cause/topic you’d like to see PQ Nation address?